How Wide is Your Window of Tolerance?

A statue of Peter Stuyvesant wearing appropriate PPE.

New times bring new thoughts, or how do we adapt to the times we’re now living in? Several terms are cropping up in social media that can help us rethink and perhaps better understand what we’re going through.

And one of them is not a new definition of cranky people. Cranky still means “given to fretfulness, easily angered, ill-tempered, grouchy, cross.” Sound familiar? Sheltering at home is not always easy. Sometimes resilience is just putting one foot in front of the other.

Someone has asked, “How wide does your window of tolerance have to be?” Window of tolerance, a term coined by Daniel J. Siegel, MD, a psychiatrist, is defined as the zone in which people are able to function most effectively.

“When a person is within their window of tolerance, it is generally the case that the brain is functioning well and can effectively process stimuli. That person is likely to be able to reflect, think rationally, and make decisions calmly without feeling either overwhelmed or withdrawn.”

How wide does our window of tolerance have to be for us to adapt to the disconnection and solitude we are experiencing, to being alone and not having the company of family and friends? What can we do so we don’t feel overwhelmed and withdrawn, which are legitimate feelings in these times. Much food for thought.

One of the ways in which we can be more tolerant of our situation is that we are now better able to see what is essential, another current meme. We now know we don’t need things, we need people, so the media is telling us. It makes me smile, a bit ruefully, that my coauthor and I have been talking about this for nearly two decades, as have others involved in the world of downsizing and decluttering. But now it seems that our message if being heard, loud and clear, by a newer and bigger audience.

What do I miss most? A friend says she can’t wait to invite us over for tea and cookies (she’s a great baker) and I can’t wait to accept her invitation. I would like the library to reopen, even if it’s just to pick up books. And I would love to get a haircut. I would like to greet my favorite people at the farmers market from a distance closer than 6 feet. I don’t miss going to the theater as much as I thought I would, maybe because there is so much available online. I don’t miss in-person meetings (although video conferencing is getting to be a drag). I would love to get on public transportation so I could visit loved ones who are a train ride away.

This need to rethink our lives brings us another new term, or rather an old term that has found new relevance: a circular economy. What this means is to reuse or recirculate what you have.

In practical terms, it means to darn your socks (as my coauthor pointed out a few weeks ago), patch your jeans, wear clothes until they wear out or pass them along to someone who will. It’s a world of wearing hand-me-down clothes, fixing electronics when possible to make them last longer, borrowing books from the library (which is not possible right now) or sharing your books and jigsaw puzzles with others. It’s a world of eating leftovers, not wasting food. It’s making protective face masks from old t-shirts. It’s carrying a bag with you when you shop, being willing to forego the free plastic shopping bags. It’s a world where we care more about the planet and its people than we do about what we can get or own or have.

We widen our window of tolerance, which helps us see that people matter more than things and that makes us more caring of the world around us.

Stay safe. Stay well. Keep sharing what you have.

Linda Hetzer is an editor and author of books on home designcrafts, and food, and coauthor of Moving On: A Practical Guide to Downsizing the Family Home

When Excess Becomes Abundance

This table full of necklaces is amazing, isn’t it? But the excess of it is a bit shocking. Sometimes a very large quantity of something, whatever that something is, is daunting and problematical to deal with. And sometimes that same excess can be seen as abundance, as plenty, as a bounty of riches.

I was having difficulty seeing the upside of this huge quantity of jewelry.

In our book and in our many blog posts, we suggest downsizing to rid ourselves of excess, to have fewer things, to streamline. We give this advice, as most people do, because we look at excess as a negative. And we stand by our recommendation to declutter because having too many things can get in the way of living our best lives. Yet there is abundance in excess.

Last weekend I produced the large jewelry sale pictured here (one I’m still recovering from!), a sale that I have organized for the last dozen years, and this year I perceived the excess we encountered as not such a positive thing. I was blown away by the generosity of the donors but troubled by the excess of the resulting donations and I realized I needed a new outlook, a slightly different perspective so I could see excess as something good.

The jewelry sale is for a non-profit and the proceeds from the sale help support their social action programs, especially a program that makes lunches for the homeless, which are then distributed by City Harvest (an organization that started the food recovery movement in 1982 to address the issue of excess food for some while others struggled to feed themselves).

We collect jewelry from individuals: items they no longer wear, gifts that were not quite their style, or pieces they have inherited. And we are fortunate to get jewelry from designers who often donate new pieces from their collections. A small group of us sort through and price the jewelry. This year there was a profusion of donations, months of sorting, and I was feeling this excess as daunting, almost as a burden. Why do we have so much, I kept asking. No one should have this much jewelry. The excess of it all was beginning to eat away at me.

Then it occurred to me that I needed to adjust my thinking. The huge amount of jewelry was not a burden (yes, maybe it would be if it ended up in the landfill) but, rather, it was a sign of the generosity of the people who donated it. That generosity meant a greener environment because jewelry people no longer wanted was finding new homes. And this generosity of donors led to great sales, which meant funds to help people in need. It was a win-win situation.

My inability to see this excess as abundance reminded me of the quote from Ramakrishna,

“An ocean of blessings may rain down from the heavens, but if we’re only holding up a thimble, that’s all we receive.”

This weekend, with a little readjustment on my part, my thimble became a bucket.

Linda Hetzer is an editor and author of books on home designcrafts, and food, and coauthor of Moving On: A Practical Guide to Downsizing the Family Home

“Reduce, Reuse, Recycle” Revisited

Language is the way we communicate with each other so words and how we use them are important. Any conversation about downsizing and decluttering, whether written or spoken, almost always incudes the frequently used catchphrase “Reduce, Reuse, Recycle.” All the words in that phrase start with “re-” a prefix that comes from the Latin and means “again” or “again and again” to indicate repetition, or it can mean going back to do something again, as in redo or revisit.

I’m revisiting my thinking about that standard: Reduce, Reuse, Recycle.

Reduce means to use less and is certainly a good place to start. Reduce means to have a smaller or lesser amount, or to bring down, to diminish, or to minimize the amount we have. And in some definitions, it means to restore, to bring back or to lead back, to its original or lower state. So if the first step in decluttering is to reduce, then one meaning is to bring ourselves back to our original state of needing or owning less. Perhaps thinking of “reduce” in that way, that our original state is one in which we need less, we will have an easier time of getting rid of the things we no longer need, or at least, maybe, we’ll be able to do it with less angst.

Reuse means to use something again, usually for its original purpose. Most of us have worn a dress or outfit again, getting multiple uses out of our clothes, and all of us reuse our dinner plates and cutlery every day. So reuse is a part of our daily life, a no-brainer. But another definition of reuse is to use something again for a different purpose, sometimes called creative reuse or repurposing. Our forebears used pieces of fabric salvaged from clothing or household items to create bed quilts. Currently, many animal shelters ask for used bedding and pillows to use as animal bedding. Sometimes we reuse by passing along our older child’s clothes to our younger child, or by giving clothing that’s still wearable to a neighbor who has a still younger child. When we were cleaning out my aunt’s closets, we donated a number of pairs of elbow length gloves to a local theater group: clothing from the past to be used as part of a costume.

Recycle means, according to one dictionary, to collect and treat what would otherwise be trash so it can be used again. We recycle paper, sometimes by writing on paper that’s already been used. My father-in-law used the back of legal size envelopes from his mail to make lists, a habit I have incorporated into my life. They are the perfect size and shape for a list. We can print on both sides of paper or go ‘paperless’ by emailing everyone the agenda before a meeting; all are ways to to save trees. Upcycling, or creative reuse, is the process of transforming old or discarded items into new products that are sometimes better than the original. At a crafts fair I went to last weekend, I saw crafters who had cut off the sleeves of old sweaters and fashioned them into fingerless mitts, and others who had felted old sweaters (washed them in very hot water to cause the fibers to lock together) and used that stronger fabric to make purses. In a fully circular economy, we would be continuously using and reusing everything, reducing greatly what goes into the landfills.

What more can we do?

We can take old thinking about our stuff and repeal it, replace it, reverse it; we can rethink what our stuff means to us.

We can think about resale – having a yard sale for toys that our kids have outgrown or taking our clothing to a resale shop – rather than tossing it.

We can reedit or refine our needs, both clothing and household. How many multiples of things do we really need to have.

We can refuse things that don’t work for us, even pens that are given out for free, and rethink things are not environmentally friendly.

We can retire old thinking.

We can show respect – for ourselves and our fellow beings, for all creatures, and for the earth.

Linda Hetzer is an editor and author of books on home designcrafts, and food, and coauthor of Moving On: A Practical Guide to Downsizing the Family Home

Of Spring Cleaning, Gently Used, and Landfills

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As spring cleaning time draws near, I’m having a bundle of thoughts about the relationship between spring cleaning, the words “gently used,” and landfills.

What do these three things have to do with each other? Well, actually quite a bit.

Spring, of course, is the time that many people aggressively go about decluttering their homes and getting rid of the things they don’t need or want anymore. And this is a good thing.

Much of what goes out of our homes goes either to organizations that can pass our “rejects” on to others who can use them; or into recycling receptacles; or into the trash. (And sadly, the stuff that ends up in the trash goes on to landfills… 😦 )

So the best thing to do, from a community health and an ecological point of view is to try to minimize the amount of stuff that ends up in the trash.

And the best thing, from the point of view of those who sort through our “rejects” in thrift stores, churches, shelters, libraries, and other places where people donate used things, is to not have to spend a lot of time sorting through stuff that really should have gone into the trash. This is why these organizations tend to stress, beg, cajole, and otherwise urge people to only donate those things that are “gently used.” And this is completely understandable. (Moldy items, for example, create unhealthy fumes for those people who are sorting through the stuff to breathe while they’re sorting, and may also contaminate things that are still usable with things that are not. This is not okay!)

But one of the big problems is what to do with the stuff that is between “gently used” and trash. We have written several posts on this blog that can help people find ways to recycle hard-to-recycle items, such as textiles, shoes, carpeting, and so on. Here is the link to a section of our blog where you can find some of those posts.

We also wrestled with this problem when we were writing our book, and what we found is that if people are committed to finding ways to reuse items that are more than gently used rather than trash them, there are ways. Just one example of this is the idea of donating old towels to an animal shelter. (The dogs. Don’t. Care!!!)

I suspect that not many people are aware of the magnitude of the problem of too much clothing going into landfills. Earth 911 reports that “the EPA estimates that Americans discarded over 14 million tons of textiles in 2010…about 5.7% of the total municipal solid waste (MSW). And while 5.7% may seem like a ‘small’ percentage, that is still 28,000,000,000 lbs. of clothing that could have been reused or recycled – every year.”  Earth 911 points out that the textiles dumped in landfills burden the environment and artificially decrease the lifespan of the products. This, they say, is where clothing recycling comes in. You can learn more about how to recycle clothing  here and about some of the initiatives businesses are taking to encourage reusing garments here.

I think it may also be time for all of us to think through the consequences of rejecting  items, whether clothing, books, or furniture, as soon as they are “gently used.” Do we really need to give away, or trash things the minute they are no longer “gently used”? And do the standards really need to be as high as they are at some of the places we donate things? Do we really imagine, for example, that one slight stain on an otherwise very serviceable (and attractive) garment, or (perfectly comfortable) chair, means that it should be trashed? That it could not still prove useful to someone? Do we really imagine that a “well-loved” picture book cannot be enjoyed just as much by a young child who has it at second or third (or even fifth?) hand, as much as they would enjoy a “gently used” one? After all, what is the most important thing about reading a picture book to a child? It is the pictures, right? And the closeness? And the voice of someone reading to them? And all of that can happen quite easily with books that are definitely more than “gently used.”

I think if we can all just become a bit more aware of what happens when we lose sight of the things we’re letting go of, and what the long-term consequences are of what we do with them, hopefully we can all become a little more thoughtful, a little bit less picky, and a lot more “green.”

Out of sight may be out of mind, but it shouldn’t be. It’s good to know that we’ve done the best we can to ensure that when we’re done using something, it doesn’t turn into a problem for someone else.

Happy spring cleaning, everyone!!! 🙂

Janet Hulstrand is a writer/editor, writing coach, travel blogger, and coauthor of Moving On: A Practical Guide to Downsizing the Family Home.

 

Back to School the Green Way

It’s back-to-school time, and for most people that means it’s back to shopping for new school clothes, books, and supplies.

We all know it’s fun buying a bunch of new stuff. But many of us are also becoming increasingly aware that new stuff inevitably becomes old stuff, and often (unfortunately) adds not only to the clutter in our homes, but also–if we’re honest with ourselves–also adds unnecessarily to pressure on the family budget, and very often on the environment as well.

And while it’s good for kids to have some nice new things to celebrate their return to school, it’s also good for us to teach them how to minimize waste, practice recycling and reuse, and in general find ways to keep our landfills from filling up any more than we need to.

Here are a few links to places where you can get some great ideas for minimizing the costs, both personal and ecological, of returning to school–and simultaneously giving your kids a pre-back-to-school lesson in green living.

http://earth911.com/home/family/8-ways-to-green-back-to-school/

http://www.oregonlive.com/business/index.ssf/2017/07/back-to-school_shoppers_gravit.html

These 16 stores will reward you for recycling old phones, clothes and more

We’d also be interested in hearing ways that parents, especially of elementary-school-age kids have found to minimize the buying of school supplies each fall. Do teachers still send home those lists of supplies that everyone is supposed to comply with? Have schools been finding ways to exercise a bit more “green thinking” in the creation of these lists, and simultaneously teaching kids about ways to reuse/recycle? And also reduce pressure on families with very tight budgets? If so, we hope you’ll share them in the comments below.

We’d love to hear your ideas, and we’ll be happy to share any strategies parents, teachers, or kids themselves have come up with in this regard.

Wishing you and your family a very pleasant–and as green as green can be–return to school!

Janet Hulstrand is a writer/editor, writing coach, travel blogger, and coauthor of Moving On: A Practical Guide to Downsizing the Family Home.

 

 

Earth Day 2017: How Will You Celebrate?

The theme for the 2017 Earth Day, the 47th year of this holiday celebrating the earth, is Environmental and Climate Literacy. The organizers of Earth Day want to empower everyone with the knowledge to act in defense of environmental protection. The hashtag for the event is #CountTo50.

Here are some ways to celebrate the day.

Create no waste.

Who better than Recyclebank to challenge us to A Day Without Waste? Accept their challenge and they will help coach you through the day. And you can follow their own progress on Twitter and Instagram using the hashtag #ZeroWasteDay.

https://livegreen.recyclebank.com/a-day-without-waste?utm_source=Facebook&utm_medium=Social&utm_content=ADayWithoutWaste&utm_campaign=Seasonal

Recycle your old technology.

Honor the earth and get money back too. The office supply company Staples is offering a $10 off $30 coupon for recycling your unused tech.

http://www.staples.com/sbd/cre/marketing/sustainability-center/earth-day/index.html

Compost your trash.

Are you ready to dispose of your potato peelings and eggshells in an earth-friendly way? Here’s some help to get you started.

http://www.makeandtakes.com/its-not-trashy-to-compost

Join the March for Science.

Earth Day Network and the March for Science are co-organizing a rally and teach-in on the National Mall in that will include speeches and trainings, musical performances, and a march through the streets of Washington, D.C. Gather at 8 am and the teach-in will begin at 9 am.

http://www.earthday.org/marchforscience/

Switch to clean energy.

You can take one simple step and along with others make a big impact together – for a brighter, healthier future.

http://www.earthdayinitiative.org/countto50

Learn more about climate change.

“The climate has always been changing – but the pace at which it is now changing is faster than humans have ever seen. Climate change threatens to make parts of the planet uninhabitable or inhospitable for life as we know… In short, it is the most pressing global challenge we have ever faced.”

http://www.conservation.org/what/Pages/Climate.aspx

How are you going to give back on Earth Day 2017? How will you contribute to a more sustainable future? Share your plans for the day in a comment below. We would love to hear from you.

Linda Hetzer is an editor and author of books on home designcrafts, and food, and coauthor of Moving On: A Practical Guide to Downsizing the Family Home

Five Easy Tips for More Green Living

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1.  Bring reusable cloth bags with you when you shop. (The only hard part of this is getting in the habit. But it’s not that hard to do!)

2. Set your computer to print on both sides of the page!!!!  (Why haven’t I thought of this before?!)

3. Take advantage of the fact that many retailers are making it easy for us to recycle hard-to-recycle things.

For example Staples and Office Depot will take batteries and printer cartridges (you can even get store credit back on the cartridges). Best Buy takes old electronics (TVs, computers, etc.) in a blessedly simple process. You bring the stuff to them, they take it off your hands and keep it out of landfill. That’s it! And Whole Foods will take wine corks, batteries and other hard-to-recycle items.

4. Resist the temptation to throw away old shoes. Instead look for ways to donate or recycle them. My coauthor wrote this great post that will help you find places to do it.

5. Stop buying styrofoam cups. They are petroleum-based, linked with a variety of health concerns, and very difficult to recycle.  See more about this here.

As spring cleaning season approaches, we would welcome any other tips you may have, especially about places that make it easy to recycle hard-to-recycle items. Please let us know in a comment!

Janet Hulstrand is a writer/editor, writing coach, travel blogger, and coauthor of Moving On: A Practical Guide to Downsizing the Family Home.

January is Get Organized Month!

SNOW

After the hectic activity of the holiday season, I always find January offers a welcome change of pace. Yes, it’s sad to see the Christmas tree go, and take the holiday cards down. But then there’s all that white space opened up again, and there’s something kind of nice about that.

January is the month for getting back to work, and it’s also been designated “Get Organized Month” by the National Association of Professional Organizers.

Here are a few of our past posts that may help you in this sleeve-rolling-up, back-to-work mode of January.

For those of you who are still “de-Christmas-ing” https://downsizingthehome.wordpress.com/2012/01/05/a-few-tips-for-a-green-post-christmas/

Tips for recycling holiday decorations https://downsizingthehome.wordpress.com/2013/01/03/recycling-christmas-trees-lights-cards-and-wrapping-paper/

In many parts of the world it’s cold outside, and it’s warm inside. Also, tax time is coming soon. What a great time for those who are determined to attack those piles of PAPER this month to get started with it. And here is some help for that task: https://downsizingthehome.wordpress.com/2014/07/11/the-paper-chase-decluttering/

Finally, in recognition of Get Organized Month, there’s this post from last year: https://downsizingthehome.wordpress.com/2014/01/16/get-organized-month-helps-jumpstart-the-new-year/

Wishing all of you a happy, healthy, and less cluttered New Year!

Janet Hulstrand is a writer/editor, writing coach, travel blogger, and coauthor of Moving On: A Practical Guide to Downsizing the Family Home.

 

 

Donate, Reuse, Recycle: A Call for Help When Downsizing

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Which are the hard-to-recycle-or-reuse items in this photo?

There are many reasons why some people have trouble getting rid of things when downsizing the home, or moving. Two of the best reasons are wanting to maximize the benefit to others by donating things that can still be used, and to minimize damage to the earth by keeping things that should be recycled out of landfills.

We’ve written a fair amount about both topics on this blog, and in many of our posts have provided tips and suggestions about ways you can go about doing both of these things. But some items are just harder to deal with responsibly, especially if the downsizing (or moving) has to be done in a hurry.

The photo above provides a clear example of the kinds of things that are fairly easy to get rid of responsibly, and the kinds of things that aren’t. Clearly, if the beautiful pot is not going along in the move, it could be easily donated (or, depending on the value, perhaps sold). Thrift stores would probably be happy to have the hangers. But what about the not-so-gently-used shoes, and the CDs? (Only a couple of CDs are shown here, but most homes would a fairly big pile of them ready to dispose of…)

This post will provide some guidance in finding ecological ways to dispense with these items. But the main purpose is to draw attention to the types of items that are unlikely to be properly disposed of when people have to move or empty a home in a hurry. And a plea that the powers that be–from shoe retailers to government agencies–help us find ways to make these things easier to recycle.

  1. Shoes. A couple of years ago my coauthor wrote a very helpful post about how to recycle or donate shoes here. And while I think it’s great that there are organizations that are helping with this process, I can’t help but wish that more shoe stores would step up (no pun intended!) and make it even easier. Why couldn’t the big chains have a program similar to Best Buy’s electronics recycling program for example? So that people in a hurry to empty a home would be able to take big bags of shoes that are no longer usable directly to the nearest store and just drop them off? Payless? DSW? Your thoughts?
  2. CDs and tapes. Earth 911 has a very helpful page on various options for dealing with CDs and videotapes you no longer want, but the fact is, most people are not going to do the right thing when it comes to old CDs and tapes if it isn’t made easier for them to do. And most people are not going to want to pay to recycle anything. Call me a dreamer, but it seems to me that if we know that having these items go en masse into our landfills is harmful to the environment (and future generations) it would seem an appropriate matter for collective action. In other words, Help! Isn’t there some way our local governments–or the state or federal government, someone, anyone!–can help make it easier for us all to do the right thing?
  3. Prescription Drugs. I didn’t realize the importance of proper disposal of prescription drugs until a cousin who is a doctor grimaced when someone suggested at a family gathering to just throw them into the trash. “No, no, no!” she said. “It goes into our water supply. That is not a good idea.” But here again the problem is the difficulty of doing the right thing. (Just take a look at these FDA guidelines and you’ll see what I mean.) So here again, I think we need help, and probably in this case pharmacies are the most likely source of assistance. Why couldn’t people bring unused/unwanted drugs back to pharmacies to be properly disposed of? Certainly they would know how to do it, right? The only option for me to properly dispose of the expired prescriptions in our home when I looked into this last summer was to drive several miles to a government office in an area with very little available parking to turn them in. It has to be made easier if we want people to do it.

I think most people understand the importance of protecting our earth from contamination. But if it’s too difficult to do things the right way, they will be tempted or forced into doing them the wrong way.

Are there other categories of items that you’ve found difficult to reuse, donate, or recycle when downsizing, or information about programs that make recycling shoes/CDs/prescription drugs easier? If so, I hope you’ll add them to the comment box below, so we can help spread the word.

Janet Hulstrand is a writer/editor, writing coach, travel blogger, and coauthor of Moving On: A Practical Guide to Downsizing the Family Home.

More Spring Decluttering: Cleaning Out Your Garage

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With the warmer weather finally here, spring cleaning is unavoidable (as much as some of us would like to avoid it!) and that means cleaning out the garage, too.

We know that there is a life beyond for the things we no longer need. Our trash can be someone else’s treasure if we take the time to get the items we would like to discard to the right places.

Here are some suggestions for recycling certain items in your garage.

Tires

According to the Rubber Manufacturers Association, in 2013 more than 95 percent by weight of the scrap tires generated in the United States were reused: as tire-derived fuel, in ground rubber applications such as playground surfaces, and for engineering and construction uses.

Regulations for recycling tires vary by state. To locate a place to recycle tires in your area, search online under “local tire recycling.”

Motor Oil

Used motor oil can be recycled. Many service stations and repair facilities will accept used oil and used oil filters. Local recycling centers may accept motor oil or be able to steer you to a place that does. The best way to locate a collection center is to visit Earth911 and search by ZIP code.

Bicycles

For places to donate your bike and for places that help recycle/reuse bicycle parts, check out Ibike.

There are programs that provide bikes to developing countries, such as Bicycles for Humanity and World Bicycle Relief; you won’t get rid of your bike but you will help others to obtain a bike that is “an engine for economic and cultural empowerment” as they say on one of the sites. What could be better than that!

Sports Equipment

Play It Again Sports will buy back used sports equipment and this blog post on houzz offers suggestions for getting rid of sports equipment in an eco-friendly way.

Sometimes an organization like the Boy Scouts or a church youth group will sponsor a drive for gently used sports equipment. Check out organizations in your area to see if they are interested in your used items.

Tennis Balls

ReBounces has suggestions for recycling large numbers of tennis balls and check out “How to Recycle Tennis Balls” at 1-800-Recycling.com.

Shoes and Sneakers

And if you have worn-out or outgrown sneakers and sports shoes lying around, check out our post on where to recycle shoes.

Keep the memories of you and your kids playing sports or enjoying a bike ride in the park, but get rid of all the stuff you no longer need. The result? A more organized garage, a grateful recipient of the donated items, and a healthier environment.

Linda Hetzer is an editor and author of books on home designcrafts, and food, and coauthor of Moving On: A Practical Guide to Downsizing the Family Home

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